5 answers from the professor: There are more only children, but are they more spoiled and selfish?

Since 2010, the number of only children in Denmark has increased by ten percent, but does that mean more egoists who are bad at sharing? DR has asked Jesper Dammeyer, a professor of developmental psychology at the University of Copenhagen and a younger brother, about the prejudices and advantages he has encountered in his research.

- I think many only children in previous generations have been told that they are self-absorbed, selfish, or difficult, but that is actually a myth. There is no research pointing to that.

- In fact, because parents have more time and resources for only children, they become more sociable, develop better social skills, and generally develop a bit faster than children who have siblings.

- It may actually be that only children feel more loneliness, simply because they don't have siblings to be with. That applies to some. But again, the fact that parents have better time and resources to spend with the child compensates.

- I also think only children can feel a sense of longing, because the norm is that a real family is the nuclear family. So children may wish for a sibling because it exists in other families.

- Research also points to some disadvantages. For example, the ability to resolve conflicts, which children can learn when they have siblings. Only children then have to learn that in daycare.

- Yes, there is evidence that because only children don't have siblings, they have to manage things on their own. They come up with games and solutions. The research is actually quite clear regarding the advantages of being an only child.

- Simply because there are more resources, finances, and energy for the child, only children actually develop a bit better cognitively and linguistically. They typically have a more positive relationship with their parents because they spend more time together.

- It largely depends on what kind of parents you have, and it also depends on whether the relationship with siblings is positive or negative. But overall, there is a slight advantage to being an only child, simply because there are more resources for you. You don't have to share with siblings.

But aren't you too positive toward only children because you have a child yourself?

- Sibling relationships can be important and positive relationships throughout life. As an adult, you can also miss having siblings. And when extended families function well, they can be wonderful to grow up in. But again, it's about how each individual family functions and whether the relationships within the family are positive.

- There is a conflict between society's interest in each woman having at least 2.1 children to maintain the population, and when parents feel ready to have children. Previously, it was more of a duty to have children and carry on the generations. Today, children are more of an individual and emotional life project.

Professor: Only children make the population slightly more productive

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When there are more only children, does the population in Denmark then shrink? Professor Peter Fallesen from the Rockwool Foundation does not think that will happen, because other factors are pulling in a different direction.

The success rate of having a child through fertility treatment has increased. Immigration makes the population larger, while women with long educations have had the same number of children over the past 25 years.

And there is also an advantage to only children.

- We have plenty of prejudices that only children are bad at sharing or are selfish. But research shows that only children are like firstborns. They are simply the first child without a sibling. Only children and firstborns perform better in school, get higher grades, and are more likely to pursue longer educations.

But is it so good that we are getting more only children?

- It will mean that on average we get a slightly more productive population, but it won't tip the scales much, says Peter Fallesen.

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